Blog of a different color

The first month

2012-02-01T19:33:00.000-08:00

Of 2012 that is. A lot can happen in a month, as I realized while feeding my son this morning. He has gone from a few, hesitant bites of banana (Jan 1) to eating half a banana in one sitting (Jan 31). We have also started sweet potatoes and avocado. The month of Jan has seen J learn to sit and improve his rolling skills (soon we'll be teaching him to bark as well). We have started the "throw something on the floor and watch Mommy pick it up" game, and he seems to be getting more interested in books lately. This past month my son decided he doesn't like sleeping, so we are in the process of working on a sleep routine to help him (and Mommy!) get more shut eye. His hair is growing so it no longer sticks up quite as much as it used to (which I miss). He is talking up a storm and one of these days I have hopes I'll begin to understand what he's saying! Recently J has been outgrowing his 3 month size clothes in favor of 6 month size.

So much has happened with J that I don't really know what has happened with me apart from him. My life is more than my son, and yet he is such an integral part of that life now that I cannot imagine what I would do or be without him. It's like when I got married - my life is more than being a wife, and yet everything I do is affected by my relationship with my husband. And it is good: being a mom, being a wife. These are gifts that God has given me which I in no way deserve but for which I will always be thankful.

Sometimes I forget to say "thank you" for that which I encounter on a daily basis. Someone once asked me what my life would be like if tomorrow I woke up with only those things or people I thanked God for today. It's a sobering thought, and one which I need to take more to heart. So I am thankful for my husband and my son; thankful for my family and friends; and thankful that God is my source of strength, my ever present help no matter my need.

This was a bit rambling I suppose, but I am the mother of a (almost!) 6 month old and this post was started 3 times today. And I just remembered that I was going to put up pictures! But because it is getting late for this mommy I will only post one tonight with the promised hope of more tomorrow.

My little punk :)

New things

2012-01-24T08:38:00.000-08:00

Don't we all like new things (except when they are changes that we aren't ready to deal with)?

Some new things from my son:

Baby hugs! When I pick him up, quite often J will cling to my neck just like he's giving me a hug. Makes me want to put him down and pick him up all the time!

Continued interest in a brand new world! While technically not a "new" thing, J is constantly seeing and experiencing things that are new to him. His appreciation and curiosity and enjoyment of the wonders of life bring new joy to Mommy as well.

Problems sleeping at night or for naps. I don't know if it is that he simply does not want to sleep because there is so much going on that he is missing, or that he is now into the "attachment" phase and just does not want to be separate from Mommy but this is a struggle. I have a book from a friend I need to read call "The No Cry Sleep Solution" and I'm hoping to get some ideas from that as to how to help him.

Sitting! Yes, my little boy is sitting on his own for minutes at a time! This is exciting and somewhat scary and wonderful! This means he can sit in his pack'n play and play with a toy while Mommy eats lunch or does dishes or writes on her blog. This also means, I am told, that crawling and walking and climbing and running are not too far away (hence the scary part)!

He is starting to understand me! Oh my goodness. I asked him the other day if he was ready to "eat" and he practically dove into my chest. I am pretty sure he understands what eat means, and I think he's got or getting the concept of "diaper" as well. It is so fun being able to communicate with my little one!

Speaking of, he is letting me know in no uncertain terms that he is getting hungry and tired. Off to try this napping thing again!

Cookies

2012-01-18T08:13:00.000-08:00

If you like peanut butter, and chocolate, and the happiness of life you need to make these cookies. I came across them by accident yesterday when reading a blog that I frequent and knew they had to happen. I was only planning to make regular chocolate chip cookies yesterday. The shame. I can never make regular chocolate chip cookies again.

Maybe.

Anyway, here is the link. Please, please try them. You will see things in a whole new way. Hopefully through the bottom of a glass of milk.

Hugs and love,

Bee

"That Mom"

2012-01-17T09:06:00.000-08:00

Have you seen the jewelry ads about "That Guy"? "That Guy" does such and such but since you can't be that great get your girl this necklace instead? They annoy my husband to no end, in part because he is "That Guy". The guy who makes dinner for his bride, spends time with her, and in general does good like he promised he would, etc (also, he's not into buying a lot of jewelry). My husband is awesome.

I also take issue with those ads. Now more than ever. Why?

Because I am not "That Mom". I don't always have everything together. I don't always know what is the right thing to do when my child screams. I don't always know how to keep him entertained, or help him physically develop, or how to stimulate his mind so he doesn't grow up dumb (just my thought process). I get frustrated, and freaked out, and depressed.

But that's not the end of the story. My friends support me and tell me I'm a great mom for J. My family comes over to babysit so I can have a break or do dishes or just have someone to commiserate with. My husband loves me and helps change diapers and says he thinks I'm wonderful. And the Bible tells me God loves me and gave me life and will never let me go no matter what.

I can't stay freaked out. I know I'm not everything I need to be, but I know I'm growing into who I'm supposed to be. And I think that's all anyone can expect of themselves. Grow. Gain. Continue to get better but remember that it doesn't happen overnight, it happens slowly, one day at a time. I may not be "That Mom", but by God's grace I will strive to be the best mom for J that I can be.

Appreciation

2012-01-16T08:09:00.000-08:00

You don't truly appreciate something until you are forced to do without it. A couple of months ago it was our freezer that was on the fritz; this weekend it was our washing machine. Now, normally I could do just fine without washing clothes for 2 days (my son hasn't gotten to the messy toddler stage yet). But I really needed my washer.

You see, we use cloth diapers. One of these days I will tout the wonders of these new fashioned old fashioned baby wraps, but not today. Today I have to tell you that when you use cloth diapers you REALLY want a working washing machine!

Friday morning I put in a load of diapers (as I do every 2 days). I set the dials and pulled the timer/start one. Nothing happened. Pushed it in, pulled it out, called my hubby. Hubby supposed the pipes might be frozen (our "laundry room" is our cold, cold garage). But since hubby was 45 minutes away at work there was not much he could do for me at the time. So I did what any girl would do in the situation: I called my dad. Dad thought there might be something wrong with the dial, so he came over and messed with it, finally deciding that our pipes were frozen.

Score 1 for hubby.

Who then came home sick and slept most of the afternoon and evening and was still too sick Sat to do anything about my washer. Which was still full of dirty diapers.

Fortunately we are the type of people who keep disposable diapers around in case of emergency (which this was!), so J was in disposables all weekend. Yeah, I definitely prefer cloth diapers - hubby and I both decided that disposable stink.

Sun was a gorgeous, beautiful, sunny day. I wish I could have been out to enjoy the weather more, it was so nice. Which meant that my pipes unfroze! I was able to wash the diapers and do 2 more loads of laundry as the hubby and a friend attempted to weatherproof that icky, cold garage. I am hopeful that not only will this be a success, but also that the church who owns this house will reimburse us (or take it off our rent) for the supplies.

All that to say: I love my washing machine. I am grateful for my washing machine. And I'm sticking with cloth diapers, no matter what! (Stay tuned for how well I hold onto that resolution as baby poo begins to turn into toddler poo!)

Testing

2012-01-11T12:59:00.000-08:00

Doing some experimenting with Photoshop...what do you think?

My baby is weird

2012-01-11T06:44:00.000-08:00

I think all babies are weird though. It's part of being human.

J is 5 months old now. Want to hear some of the weird/new things he's doing now?

He eats cloth. Ok, that might be a bit of an exaggeration. Anything that comes to hand goes to mouth. Recently, however, the child seems to prefer chewing on cloth things. His bib. The long legged stuffed frog from my sister's mother-in-law. My shoulder. Does this mean he's teething? Or that he is simply developing early his taste in clothes?

There is less immediate fussing when I put him on his tummy. He still does not see a purpose in being there, but if I stay down on the floor with him and make sure he has things to see and play with we don't get the instant screaming we had for a while there. He does roll over, but that is still inconsistent.

He is SO CLOSE to sitting on his own! He can sit supported, and for short periods can hold himself up, but leave him for too long and he sllllliiiides down. Or falls sideways. Which can be humorous when you are on the bed but not very fun anywhere else.

"Talking" has become a BIG part of our lives now. Talking and yelling. I'm working on signing with him to aid in communication but he's not at the point yet where he can sign back. Trust me, you will hear ALL about it when he does start signing or saying actual words!

This child is too cool. I love my Jonathan :)

Corn and shrimp chowder

2012-01-06T13:52:00.000-08:00

This will be my first foray into showing you a recipe through photographs. Please let me know what you think.

This week I made corn and shrimp chowder. I have never made chowder before. I have not made very many soups in fact, mainly preferring my potato soup over all others. Remind me to make that for you sometime. Anyway, I noticed that I had several cans of corn in my cupboard and since I had been making noises about trying chowder for some time now my husband suggested I put the corn to good use in that way. Also, shrimp was suggested but I do not remember by who (whom?). I used this recipe as the basis and then modified it as I saw fit.

First off is an onion. I have to say, this was a big deal for me - I hate onions. But I had a way to get around that, as you will see. So, one small onion gets peeled and chopped.

Also, a couple of cloves of garlic. I like garlic. Normally I would say they need to be minced but as you will see in a minute, I have a plan for that.

Melt a couple of tablespoons of butter in a large pot and toss in the onions.

They will start out looking like this:

And then begin turning translucent and soft:

Once they get to this point you can toss in the garlic. Do not saute the garlic for more than a minute or so or it will burn and be gross. Next comes my way of dealing with onions in my soup - I pureed them.

I'm sorry if you think this is gross. Deal.

Where am I? Right, yes. The onions go back into the pot along with 2 cans of corn.

Cook this around a bit, then add in a couple of tablespoons of flour (or skip to the next step, realize you forgot the flour and add in some cornstarch mixed with water. This may or may not have the thickening effect you desire so I will show you another trick to deal with that later).

At this point if you have some chicken broth/stock you may add that in but I didn't have any so I used chicken bullion (that word looks so odd) to make my own "broth". I used 2 1/2 cups approximately (1 bullion cube per 1 cup of water). A little more or less is not a big deal.

While this was going on my wonderful husband was detailing the shrimp for me (because I did not realize until I had started that this was something that needed to be done).

Doesn't he have nice hands?

While that was going on I was measuring out cheese. I'm not too strict about my cheese measurements, but I put in about 2 cups. If I had had mozzarella I would have used that but I did what I could.

Get that shrimp in to heat up. I used cooked shrimp which made my life just that much easier.

The heat should be on lowish by now. As you can see in the above picture I have already added in 2 cups of milk. Where is that photo? I have absolutely no idea. Sorry, still working on this photo recipe thing. Anyway.

Give things a stir and see how it's going.

Pour in cheese, stirring between cups to make sure it melts.

Realize the cornstarch was not enough to thicken soup. So remember a wonderful trick your mother taught you and do this:

Mashed potato flakes. Wonderful invention for thickening soup. I never make instant potatoes, but I always keep a box on hand for situations like this.

Add salt and pepper to taste. My dear hubby added paprika to his.

And you have just made corn and shrimp chowder!

I was rather proud of myself for this. New things are exciting :)

Adding up

2012-01-03T09:49:00.000-08:00

This holiday season by the numbers, Thanksgiving to Christmas to New Years:

· 1 Present I forgot to give

· 2 Presents I have not yet had opportunity to give

· 3 Thanksgiving meals consumed

· 4 Christmases celebrated

· 5 States traversed

· 6 Meringues eaten (in 2 days)

· 7 New recipes tried

· 8 Snowflakes created

· 9 Games played

· 10 Books given

· 12 Days I read my Bible successfully (this number MUST go up!)

· 14 Days spent traveling (4 flights and 21(at least!) car hours logged with an infant)

· 22(?) Baby milestones reached

· 29 Books received by my little family of 3

· 70 Cookies baked

· 100 Cups of coffee drunk (this number is approximate, and to be fair much of it was decaf)

· 1,958 Pictures taken

· Approximately 5,000 hugs, smiles and laughs shared with family and friends

Being sick

2011-12-27T06:03:00.000-08:00

I have a cold. Yup, wet and juicy coughing is the name of the game now, and I just want to know one thing: how can I help prevent my son from getting what I've got? It's not like I can avoid being around him, you know? And nursing means I have even less options for trying to keep him away from my germs. This is the sound of me sighing...

I guess I just pray and hope. If you have any suggestions as to how I can keep my child healthy or how to get over a cold quickly please let me know.

The things you learn

2011-12-21T07:44:00.000-08:00

We just returned from taking my 4 month old son on a week long vacation halfway across the country. He did better at traveling than some adults. As someone put it to me so well "It's always a little nerve wracking knowing that you could be the one with 'that little kid who never stopped screaming the whole flight'." But he didn't! Jonathan tends to cry for specific, fixable reasons. When he's hungry, tired, wet, bored. These are things I can take care of - and when I can help my baby be happy I feel like a Good Mommy. That being said, it was really wonderful to have family around to hold, cuddle and play with him. It makes all the difference when you can hand the baby off to someone and go down to the pool for half an hour with your hubby, or go see Sherlock Holmes with hubby and siblings.

Also, I have a renewed appreciation for coffee! Let me tell you something, babies don't understand time differences. Add that together with being in a new place and Mommy doesn't get as much sleep as she was hoping for on vacation! But my dad and my sisters are strong coffee aficionados so I am assured of getting what I need wherever we go - another nice thing about traveling with family as my dear hubby does not drink the stuff.

Between hubby and me we took 979 pictures this past week. Many of them were of the old ships we toured but I do have some of people - including that beautiful child of mine :)

There are so many things I want to say, but in the interest of keeping this at a readable length I will continue posting about our Grand Adventure tomorrow. This week we also need to talk about Christmas (and how this year I had ALL my shopping done! Until I didn't). What do you do for presents for a 4 month old who doesn't understand any of it?

Until tomorrow then...

What do you do?

2011-12-13T09:49:00.000-08:00

-What do you do when you just want to fly halfway across the country and smack somebody upside the head?

-What do you do when someone you love is hurting but they are halfway across the country and you feel helpless to help them?

-What do you do with all those pictures of a person who suddenly decided they didn't want to be involved in your lives anymore?

-What do you do with prepaid airline tickets when there isn't going to be a wedding?

I don't know what you would do, but here's what I've done so far:

-I prayed, then played video games in godmode with my hubby to kill monsters as much as I wanted.

-I pray and send random, hopefully encouraging, texts and ask people to join with me in prayer.

-I ignore them. For now.

-We are flying to CA. Taking a family vacation. We are going to do silly things and have fun, and my 4 month old will experience his first plane trip.

I still want to smack somebody upside the head. I still hurt for my brother. Those feelings aren't going away anytime soon. But life is more than anger, life is more than pain. God has given us so many blessings, and we have so much to be thankful for. This too shall pass.

Being a mommy means...

2011-12-07T09:56:00.000-08:00

…feeling responsible when your baby doesn’t sleep.

…fighting back tears when you put your baby down for 30 seconds to use the bathroom because he’s not feeling well so he bawls until you pick him up again.

…calling your mom when you are at your wit’s end after 9 hours of your baby getting only 1 hour of sleep and crying almost every time you put him down.

…celebrating when he naps for longer than 15 minutes.

…snuggling under the blankets in the mornings before either of you are fully awake.

…getting smiles and giggles when you kiss his fingers (which you do every chance you get even though you know that hand was just recently being slobbered on).

…loving all those wonderful people who love your baby.

Today

2011-12-06T11:31:00.000-08:00

Today I babysat my 2 1/2 year old niece for an hour and a half. My son is 4 months old which means I'm still at something of a loss as to what to do with a 2 year old. So we colored with (washable) markers. That lasted all of 7 minutes. Then we were going to read but she couldn't decide on a book. Then she noticed my computer so I taught her how to use Paint (rather less successful than real markers because she couldn't quite grasp the idea of pushing the button and dragging the cursor but she kept asking to go back to it later), Word (she knows very well now what the backspace key does), and watched Veggie Tales Silly Songs on Youtube. Then she surprised me by playing quietly with some of my toys for perhaps 15 minutes. By herself. This allowed me time to put my son down for a nap and get him up again because he decided not to sleep.

Oh yes, that's the other fun thing in my day: my 4 month old has decided that sleep is for wussies. He has slept, intermittently, a grand total of 30 minutes in the past 7 hours. 30 minutes. 7 hours. Of course this makes him grouchy. Too grouchy to sleep so he wouldn't be grouchy anymore. These are the times that I wonder if my mother put a curse on me - was I like this as a child? Better question: how did she deal with having a toddler and a baby at the same time? Better question: how did she handle 5 kids under the age of 9???? And she did it all without internet help, and she moved away from family before the 5th was born so she was on her own (with my dad) except for church family and never went anywhere without us probably and homeschooled us all (and we all turned out ok and succeeded in school/jobs/family/etc) without going crazy. And did I mention she plays piano, sings, acts, teaches and directs when she gets the chance? Right. Forget the curse - my mother is Superwoman.

I can only do what I can do. Which includes babysitting for my sister in short time increments, trying new meals for my hubby when I can, falling behind on housework and looking sadly at the dishes in the sink, and loving on my son. And that's the important thing. It's what my mom did: love us. Love us, and spend time with us, and support us in whatever we decided to do.

Thank you for reading my rambling stream of consciousness. Thank you, Shelbs for putting up with me. Thank You, God for all the wonderful people in my life and a chance to eat a proper lunch today!

Until next time,

Bee

Cooking experiments

2011-12-03T11:20:00.000-08:00

This week I had 2 successes and 1 not-so-much-a-success-but-not-a-complete-failure-if-covered-in-bbq-sauce experiments in cooking.

Success #1: Tuesday I made "Mexian" style chicken in the slow cooker with tomatoes, served over rice. Some editing may be made to this recipe in the future, but for a first attempt it was really not bad. I am in love with my slow cooker.

Success #2: Wednesday I made chicken and green bean casserole with a cheese sauce and tater tots on top. YUM. We finished off those leftovers on Thursday. Don't really think this recipe needs adjusting, although I might try it with different veggies or cheeses.

Not-so-much-a-success-but-not-a-complete-failure-if-covered-in-bbq-sauce: For lunch today I attempted to make my own version of hash browns with potatoes and leftover cajun chicken from the freezer. This meat I do not recommend for this dish. I ended up only eating the eggs. Shelbs ate all of it, but covered it with bbq sauce and said it was much better that way. While I do plan to try hash browns again, this recipe needs much work.

Mostly a successful week in experimenting with new things I think. Next week I might try to actually follow some recipes instead of making up my own. We'll see. Tomorrow hubby is making tomato basil soup. I'm looking forward to this in no small part because the recipe calls for 2 cups of gouda!

Have a lovely weekend! May God show His love to you in extra special ways!

Bee

Being a mommy means...

2011-11-30T11:53:00.000-08:00

…sitting up in a rocker at 4am for an hour because your baby can’t sleep.

…letting your lunch get cold because your baby got hungry sooner than expected.

…nuzzling freshly washed baby head.

…kissing baby as often as you want.

…watching your baby explore a new world – even when it means hitting himself in the face with the rattle he just learned how to grab.

…listening to your baby’s laugh when you tickle him.

Check back on Wednesdays for more "Being a mommy means..."

Is it possible?

2011-11-28T06:27:00.000-08:00

Mondays.

Lots of people hate Mondays. Until recently I was one of them. But I'm starting to feel my perspective change. Granted, I still strongly dislike my hubby going back to work after having him home for two days, but I am realizing that Mondays do not have to be blue. Ever since I became a (mostly) stay-at-home mom three and a half months ago we have been trying to figure out a schedule. I am told babies like schedules. I am bad at schedules. I am a freelance interpreter for a reason; things like my schedule always change and that keeps me interested and on my toes. Doing the exact same thing everyday makes me NUTS. So I have a hard time with the "babies do better on a schedule" idea. We are working on the idea of naps, but that is about as much schedule as I can handle right now. Except for Mondays. Mondays have become almost sacred in the "stay home and chill" department. We don't tend to go out on Mondays, we don't like to run errands or even be dressed by a certain time. We chill at home. We do laundry (ugh!) or dishes, or other necessary things here (like update a blog!). And we chill. We relax. We just hang out. I need this time to be a better Mommy. J needs this time to recover from the weirdness of the weekend and have time with just me.

Yup. I'm starting to like Mondays.

And I think J agrees :)

Cooking is fun

2011-11-23T15:39:00.000-08:00

Cooking is fun.

I'm learning this more and more lately. Coming up with a new creation or following a new recipe is an exciting project. Also, I like to know what is in the food I eat and cooking for myself allows me to do that. My husband and I have different cooking philosophies; I taste as I go and he tastes at the end. I cannot stand his method! He doesn't know until it may be too late if something needs adjusting! But then again, with me tasting all the time I have a tendency to second guess myself continually. I suppose there is something to be said for both, but I'll stick with my way, thanks.

Today I made up a dinner for some friends and my sister dropped it off at their house. I will never get to taste it and I won't know if it was good or not! Grr. That's OK though. I will just have to try it again here sometime.

My family is coming to my house Friday morning for breakfast. I'm going to make baked french toast and I'm rather excited about it because it is so darn yummy. There probably won't be any apples this time as I forgot to pick any up today. Oh well, they will live.

Hubby is baking pies for tomorrow.

I love Thanksgiving.

Cooking is fun.

Thank you for reading my random disjointedness. Trust me when I tell you that it might have been much worse.

2011-11-21T08:32:00.000-08:00

Today, I am thanking God for my immediate family - those I grew up with, and those I married into:

Thank You for my Mom. She taught me so much growing up, and continues to teach and inspire me now that I'm a mom myself.

Thank You for my Dad. He is encouraging and smart and supportive.

Thank You for my sister, Dana. She is a wonderful mom and such an encouragement to me as a new mom.

Thank You for my nieces, Daisy and Fern. They are such fun and they love their cousin, J.

Thank You for my brother-in-law, Joseph. His quiet support and love are perfect for my sister and I love to see their marriage thrive.

Thank You for my brother, Josh. His pursuit of You is an example that inspires and encourages.

Thank You for my almost-sister-in-law, Molly. For the light she is in Josh's life.

Thank You for my sister, Jessie. Her passion - whether for movies, books, family, or You - is a wonder and a joy.

Thank You for my sister, Hannah. Her joy and laughter light my soul.

Thank You for my mother-in-law. Her quiet strength and love for her son and mine.

Thank You for my father-in-law. How much he loves J.

Thank You for my brother-in-law, Kirby. How he and Shelbs are reconnecting.

Thank You for my sister-in-law, Abby. Her excitement for life and passion for J.

Thank You for my son, J. Thank You for the wonder that he is. Thank You for the opportunity to raise him, the chance to love him. Thank You that he is healthy and growing on a daily basis.

And Lord, thank You for my husband. He means so very, very much to me. Thank You for his love, thank You for his companionship, thank You for his awesomeness.

2011-11-19T18:21:00.001-08:00

One of these days I will get back to posting.

Learning

2011-11-11T08:05:00.000-08:00

Things I never thought about doing/knew I could do while holding a baby:

- Make a pot of coffee

- Run a load of laundry/dishes (I can’t wash dishes one-handed yet, but I’m sure that’s coming)

- Cook (this gets awkward and I usually try to get someone to be my other hand but it is possible on some things!)

- Perform in a crowd of thousands of people (alongside my husband who was dressed as a tree)

- Carry an armload of books (here’s a hint: if you’re going to a book sale take a stroller)

- Use the restroom (yes he was in a sling at the time and no I do not plan to try this again but I now know it’s possible!)

I’m sure other things will come up. I am constantly amazed at the things my son is teaching me. Soon I’ll be learning how much mess a child can make in one sitting!

I want to be learning everyday! Someone once said that when you stop learning you’re dead – and I’m not gonna plan on being dead till it happens! Today God reminds me that His mercies are new every morning. The old has passed away; behold the new has come. I want to learn from each day as it comes, then let it pass away behind me as I move forward. The mistakes, the wrong attitudes, the failures of yesterday are no more – they are washed away by His grace and He has given me a bright new day to try again!

What else might I learn today if I look for it?

Birthday

2011-11-09T08:01:00.000-08:00

I am 28 today. Goodness. Not sure what to think about that yet, except realize that time is flying by like nobody's business. I am going to post a list of things I would like to accomplish by the time I turn 30. I ~~stole~~ ~~borrowed~~ ~~adapted~~ got this idea from a friend of mine. You can find her blog at http://badmommydiary.blogspot.com/

30 by 30

1. Read 20 new books (not including children’s books which I can easily go through 5 at a time)

2. Read 10 classics (I’ve realized how many of these I own compared to how many I’ve read and it’s rather embarrassing)

3. Finish organizing old photographs into albums or scrapbooks

4. Get rid of all those shirts that I keep saying I might wear someday but never do

5. Learn to follow a sewing pattern

6. Learn to walk on 5’ peg stilts

7. Try 50 new recipes (this so far is going better than I thought it would, but I don’t know how that’s going to change when I have a toddler)

8. Design and create my own costume

9. Learn to crochet

10. Direct Godspell

11. Perform in another stage show

12. Take a dance class

13. Learn 3 swing dance aerials to do with my husband

14. Simplify my life by getting rid of STUFF– I’m not sure yet what measureable to put on this to know whether or not I have succeeded

15. Take walks at least 3 times a week – not sure how I’m going to do this in the winter time, maybe become a mall walker mom during the cold months?

16. Set up a will/custody documents for J should anything happen to me and the hubby

17. Spend time at least once a week with a friend

18. Maintain an active prayer journal

19. Lead a Bible study

20. Read through the Bible completely (haven’t done this since Bible college and it needs to happen again)

21. Buy a house (yeah, I’m not totally optimistic about this one, but I can try)

22. Memorize 30 Bible verses

23. Memorize 3 sonnets

24. Get to know the ladies at my church better (ie: be more sociable)

25. Clean out the garage enough to consider getting a deep freeze

26. Consistently maintain an active blog

27. Stick with cloth diapering

28. Teach a sign language class

29. Travel to a state I’ve never been

30. Feel organized – if only briefly

What are your goals for the next 2 years?

A picture is worth...

2011-11-08T08:10:00.000-08:00

Ah, the things a picture can say. Beauty, sorrow, love, power, cuteness - all can be expressed so concisely by a single photo. Here is my picture of adorableness for the morning:

Thing is, pictures can lie. My son looks like he's sleeping and content and everything is well in his laundry world. In fact he was rather ticked that I stuck him in there so I could bring the laundry in without leaving him on the floor of the garage.

I love pictures.

Preferences

2011-11-07T08:02:00.000-08:00

My father-in-law came to visit us this weekend. It was his first time to see J since the hospital (and there he only got to see him at a distance through glass). He likes being a grandpa :) His wife also came down, and I feel better about her now. I have discovered something during the 3 months since my son was born: I like people who like my son. Those who coo over how sweet he is, those who talk to him, those who beg to hold him - they all, somehow or other, seem to end up on my good list. It is a response that is not solely connected to my son, for I find that when someone likes someone I love or appreciates what they do it seems natural that I warm towards that person. On the flip side I need to be careful because I get very defensive of those I love which, although right and good, needs to be tempered with kindness for that poor individual who needs his or her preferences altered.

Last night I dreamed about pie. I dreamed a lot of other things of course, but the one that has overwhelmingly stuck with me this morning is the blueberry pie I bought but never got to eat. I even bought blueberry turnovers at the same time I bought the pie because I was craving blueberries that much. But yeah, woke up without being able to properly indulge. *sigh*

Currently I'm watching J examine his binky and try to pick up a rattle in the same, full, hand. Also, indulging in coffee because I don't have any pie. And praying that our fridge gets fixed before food starts going bad.

I've started reading a book about anxiety. I really enjoy the author, John MacArthur, because he is practical and full of scripture. I'll be letting you know how it goes, but for now I need to quit rambling. Will I do anything productive? Perhaps.

Perhaps I'll just play with my son.

Time

2011-11-03T15:00:00.000-07:00

Clocks everywhere. On the oven, in the car, on the wall, on our phones. We pay so much attention to what time it is, we tend to forget to pay attention to how we use that time.
My husband and I are going out tonight. If only for a quick drink, we need to spend some time together. If we don't spend time on our relationships, how can they grow?
I tend to waste time. I spend it like there will always be a tomorrow. But there won't always be a tomorrow. My baby won't always cuddle with me. My sister won't always be available to chat. I won't always have the ability to hold a guitar or a camera or a broom.
This post is getting deeper and poking me rather more than I anticipated. I'm sorry, I don't mean to be a downer or anything. Let's look at things another way:
Time is a gift. The years, the days, the minutes we have should be treated like something precious.
"Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil." Eph 5:15-16
Let us enjoy the time that we have, helping people and serving as we should. Rather than make hay, let us do good while the sun shines :)

Something new

2011-11-02T08:34:00.000-07:00

My son is starting to discover that he can hold things with his hands. But he's very suspicious because he doesn't quite understand what this means:

A bit of music, a bit of outrage, then something better

2011-11-01T08:59:00.000-07:00

I was going to write about guitar. Then I was going to write about this article that got me so mad: http://news.yahoo.com/pregnant-mom-says-sandwich-arrest-horrifying-214407004.html
Then I decided I didn't want to post about either of those things so instead I'm going to show you what I made for dinner last night:

It's like a cheesy egg salad that you put on your bread of choice and then broil till it's melty and crispy. YUMMY! It's fast and easy and can be made up ahead of time if you need to. I loved it. Here's where I got it from: http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2010/07/make-ahead-muffin-melts/
Let me know how you like it!
-Bee

The Beginning

2011-10-31T08:16:00.000-07:00

Everything has to have a beginning.
This is mine:
My beginning as a blogger, trying to make sense of my life as a new mother; trying to keep my priorities straight; trying not to lose who I am - or who I think I am - in the process.
This is a blog about my life. Now where shall we start?
My husband, Shel, and I have been married for a couple of years now. We have a beautiful, 12 week old son named J. We live in a tiny house full of books. Seriously: full. I haven't counted them lately, but I believe we have close to a literal ton of books filling our shelves. It's a comfortable, happy place.
The walls that aren't covered by books are being taken over by photographs. Some old, many new (when you have a new baby you go a little camera-happy).
We are surrounded by wonderful family, a supportive church, and the best friends I could ask for.
Tonight we are going to a Halloween get together. We will be wearing hoodies and employing accents to be "English hooligans". My hubby's idea. We couldn't do what I had originally wanted - I couldn't find the Union Jack shirt I wanted, and they don't make gas masks small enough to fit J (if you don't understand the reference here I suggest you brush up on your BBC sci-fi).
Well, this child is telling me he's ready to eat, so I'll let that be the end of the first post. As your photo for the day I give you this: